Care Management ~ Eldercare Advocacy ~ Dementia Care

Dear Judie,

After Dad’s (87) recent Alzheimer’s diagnosis, Mom (82) sprang into action and took over. She’s consulted with their legal and financial advisors, our pastor, downsizing to move to a more manageable space; her progress is dizzying. She’s says; “I know we need help, but right now I have to get things in order.”  Should I be worried or is this normal?

• Patty, PSL

Dear Patty,

There is no “normal” reaction to a diagnosis of Alzheimer’s (AD). Mom sounds wonderfully strong and capable; a fixer who is used to taking charge and focusing on the long “to-do” list that usually accompanies AD diagnoses. Mom’s feverish activity may also be a sign she’s not ready to accept the diagnosis. The danger begins when Mom’s “to-do” list changes into a “can’t do” list. Most caregivers begin their journey wanting to “help” a loved one. As the disease progresses and their ability to “help” or influence events decreases, they forget about “helping” and become anxious and guilty because they cannot “cure” their loved ones. Mom (and you) need Alzheimer’s specific counseling to learn new coping skills, and caring family and friends to help her face enter gently into Alzheimer’s realities. You will also.  

Start now!  Get help from the experts at  Alzheimer’s Community Care (Martin772-223-6351, St. Lucie 772-460-9166, Ft. Pierce 772 466-3261); Alzheimer’s Assn. (800-272-3900);  Vero Alzheimer’s/Parkinson’s Assn. (772-563-0505).

Judie Rappaport, President & Founder
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